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from My Inner Life

by Jessica Fryer, 15, Wichita Falls, Texas

How long can I stand the rain?
How long can I stand the pain?
Why can't I feel happy and humble?
Where's the light at the end of the tunnel?
I feel so small and alone.
As loud as I scream, it sounds like a moan.
I want to escape the reality of things.
I want to wake up, but I live in a dream,
Body and mind.
Why can't I just hide?
I don't want to hurt anymore.
It feels like I've been struck straight down to the core.
In my heart, in my body,
I'm looking and looking, but I just can't find me.
I'm through with the suffering.
How could life get any rougher?
The pain is a cancer and it's killing me inside.
Slowly but surely it's eating me alive.
Why can't I cure the cancer?
Why can't I find an answer?
I'm full of confusion.
Life's like a delusion.
I'm fed up with the game of life.
I'm ready to call it a night.
The pain is so piercing, like a vampire's bite.
This is my life rolled up like a blunt.
This is my life when being happy's all I want.

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